Rock & A Hard Place
by cynicalspring
Summary: Mizu has just encountered every childfree woman's worst nightmare. She's pregnant. How is she going to tell him she doesn't want to keep it? DonxOC M for language & controversial subject matter. UPDATE 7.22.13: Finished! I hope you all enjoyed my story :)
1. Chapter 1

A/N 7.18.2013: Just fixed the 1st chapter.

A/N This is my very first fanfic, and my first attempt at creative writing in a long LONG time. Any pointers would be helpful.

I own nothing except for oc's Mizu & Elric

Mizu: 30 Years old, 150 lbs 5'8" curvyish. Black shoulder length razored hair with outdated swoopy emo bangs, tattoos, Pretty, but not super pretty. Maybe a solid 7. Speaks like a sailor.

Elric: Black great dane with a white star on his chest. His ears are cropped. 5 years old, mellow happy dog.

Kind of a/u? Imagine the turtles as you see fit, just know that they're all in their late 20's early 30s. Donatello is 30 in this, a few months ahead of Mizu.

* * *

Mizu laid on her bed staring at the ceiling, trying to enjoy the cool air coming from the old window unit. She just installed the slightly yellowing a/c this morning. Donnie had found it on one of his scavenging trips and fixed it up for her, and to be honest it probably worked better than anything she would have gotten new (and overpaid for). It was a hot summer & her old unit was beyond salvaging. She was determined to get by with just her few fans, but he was worried about her & Elric getting heat stroke. At the time it was a nice most welcome surprise, but today it made her feel like crap. Complete and utter crap. How dare he be so fucking thoughtful. She looked over at the nightstand and at the two used pregnancy tests sitting on top of the copy of _A Brief History Of Time_ that Donnie had also given her. She had forgotten to put the caps back on the ends of the sticks.

"Great. Just great." She said out loud, hoping she hadn't just made a bio hazard of the book.

"Fuuuuuuck. This EFFING sucks. What the fuck am I going to do? I can't tell him… No. I have to, right? This is so fucking stupid!"

She sat up, swung her legs over the side of the bed, grabbed the pregnancy tests as she walked to the bathroom & sighed heavily as she looked at the "+" on each one, and chucked them violently into the waste basket.

"Ohhhh our DNA is too different… Nothing like this could ever happen… We don't need protection" she said mocking Donatello's voice.

"He's a dead man."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N Chapter 2. It's off to a good start?

I forgot to mention, Mizu is not actually Japanese. She's caucasian. Her parents loved asian culture in a terrible "everyone's kung fu fighting" late 70's early 80's kind of way.

* * *

A few hours later, Mizu was able to collect her thoughts, and had her mind made up. No. Freaking. Way. She was barely able to take care of herself. She had just started a new business, was living in a crappy apartment, barely fit for her & her dog, and more importantly, she hated kids. H-A-T-E-D them. With the firey passion of ten thousand white hot suns. But she loved Donnie, and was afraid to hurt him. Would her decision hurt him? He had seemed ok with her being childfree from the beginning, but then, he had never thought children were in the cards for him. They had been sleeping together for 3 years and nothing had ever happened. Plus, they were two different species, and as the song goes, "pig & elephant DNA just won't splice"…

Mizu was ripped from her thoughts and away from the cutting board by a knock on her living area window. Crap, she forgot that Donnie usually came through the bedroom window, which was now home to one air conditioner, and she usually kept the living room window locked. Any shrink worth his salt would have said she forgot to unlock it accidentally on purpose. She really didn't want to have the conversation she and Donnie needed to have.

Elric started barking up a bark storm. No matter how hard she tried to work with him, it was a habit that she just couldn't get him to break, but then she supposed a 150lb barking Great Dane might come in handy should someone probably try to break in. He was probably the reason she never had to replace her electronics, because lets face it, nobody was making off with her re-used plastic "silverware".

"you're such a noise machine" She affectionately gave him a rub between the ears as she went & unlocked the window.

"Hey Ricky Martin! There's my most handsome boy" Donnie ducked inside the window only to be immediately leaned upon by the massive dog.

"Well "Hi" to you too, tall green & nerdy. What am I, chopped liver? And stop calling him that. That is the worst possible nickname on the face of the planet. You know I hate the musical stylings of ricky martin"

"I know, That's why I call him that" He flashed her what could only be described as a shit eating grin as he came over and embraced her. He put his finger under her chin to lift her face for a kiss, but she pulled away.

"Not while I'm cooking, especially after last week. Mike is still mad at us for setting fire to his new crock pot. I mean, seriously, how the hell does a _CROCK POT_ catch fire?!"

"Hmmm yeah, I guess you're right. You know he made me BUY him a new one. I told him I could fix the old one, but he insisted I buy him one. From that expensive kitchen gadget place… Wilhelm somethingorother. Lucky for him I'm pretty good at bypassing security. $365 dollars later…"

"I think you mean Williams Sonoma, and you didn't have to break in you know. There's this handy little invention called the internet, and you can order all sorts of things and they magically appear at your door 1-2 weeks later."

"Yeah, sure. my '_door'_… and you forgot to count the Mikey-is-Obnoxious factor. Can you imagine 1-2 weeks of hyperactive guilt trips?"

"OH THE HORROR! OH THE HUMANITY!" Mizu shouted as she waved a wooden spoon in the air in an exaggerated display. "But for real, You made the right choice…. Speaking of choices…"

"So what smells amazing?" Don said cutting her off. Mizu couldn't decide if she was annoyed or relieved at his unwitting change of subject.

"Oh, I'm making chili. I got some bhut jolokia powder at this cool little grocer & I'm taking our faces on a whirlwind adventure!"

"And the 50 gallons of sour cream in the fridge are for what now? Did you leave any for anyone else?…" Donnie grabbed two bottles of Blue Moon & an orange, and walked over to the counter & began to cut slices of the citrus. He was never really into drinking or beer before Mizu, but she had a thing for craft beer. In the 3 years that they were together he developed an appreciation for it as well, but his favorite was Blue Moon. Mizu always made sure she had some on hand for him.

"Don't exaggerate. There's only 30 gallons in there." Mizu replied with a smile. "Besides, as a ninja you should know that dairy & bread are the best weapons against the ghost chili's hot hot heat!" the last part she said with a latin flourish. Elric perked up his ears & lifted his head. Apparently he was taking a liking to the accent. She really needed to tell Don to stop playing "la vita loca" around him.

Donnie poured them each a pint of the amber colored beer over the perfect DNA spirals he had cut from the orange. He walked over to Mizu and handed her the glass. She looked at it tentatively. A beer. With fresh made DNA? Fuck you too, universe. Well, seeing what her decision was & perhaps underscoring to herself what an awful parent she'd probably be anyway, she decided not to let good beer go to waste. She closed her eyes as she took a sip & savored the faint notes of wheat & citrus. Heaven. No way could she give this up. She opened her eyes & admired the double helix floating in her glass.

"Oh, look at you Mr. Fancy McSlice-N'-Dice. Are you sure Mikey should be your resident cook?"

"Back off, Man. I'm a scientist."

"You did not just quote the legendary Dr. Venkman at me"

"Oh, I so just did."

"You are the sexiest man alive right now who isn't Bill Murray"

"You love it"

He had closed the distance during their short exchange, and turned the range top off. Donnie scooped Mizu up bridal style, wooden spoon, apron, & all and headed to the bedroom. She decided in the middle of her pretend struggling & giggles that both the chili & her important news could wait until later.


	3. Chapter 3

Later that evening Donatello sat on the oversized couch with his laptop and was engrossed in writing some sort of computer code, but then his mind started to wander & he found himself googling crock pots.

"Ugh! For a genius I sure am a fucking idiot sometimes!"

"Don't swear, That's my job. What's up, buttercup?"

"I just found the same crock pot online for $100 cheaper, and I forgot that you have that two day delivery thing. I could have just done that and had it sent here!"

"I was wondering when you would figure that out." Mizu looked over the top of her book, hiding her grin in the pages.

She sat on the other end of the couch, her legs draped over Elric, who had claimed the entire middle cushion and most of the end cushions, and was trying to nose the computer off of Donnie's lap. She sighed and smiled at the struggle. Ahhh a boy & his dog.

Finally the dog had succeeded in his quest for pets & Donnie put his computer on the coffee table / dinner table next to the empty chili bowls & 3 empty pints of sour cream. Mizu wasn't kidding about the chili being hot, although it was flavorful. She couldn't cook much, but she could make a damn good pot of chili. He took in what he thought was a comical scene. A giant turtle petting a giant dog, sitting on a giant couch in the smallest apartment he'd ever seen. He smiled at the thought of being able to do something about that someday, perhaps sooner than later.

"Tell me again, What possessed you to get such a large couch?"

"I've told you this a million times. One: It was free, and two: I got it for Elric. Danes love their couches, and he doesn't ask for much. The least I could do was get him a dane sized couch." Donnie swore he saw Elric nod in approval.

"Hey Donnie, can I ask you something?" her heart was pounding in her throat.

"No." He said with a smirk

"Ha. Ha. Very funny. But seriously, can I ask you something?"

Donnie nodded "Of course…." His brow furrowed. He had sensed something was up all night & he was starting to worry that she wasn't going to let him in on whatever it was that was bothering her.

"Where did you get the money to pay for the crock pot we broke? $300 is a lot to spend on something like that." _damn it damn it damn it! Why can't I just tell him?!_

"Oh, yeah, that…" He got a sheepish look on his face & blushed a bit. "I was going to wait to tell you at Christmas, but you'll never let it go, so here goes…. Remember when you asked me to write you an accounting program for your new business, something secure, but user friendly?"

"Yeah, what about it?"

"Well, you liked it so much I decided to try & market it. Apparently it's been taking off. I've made a ton of sales already."

"What's a ton?"

"I've got a little under $200,000 saved"

Mizu, who was in the middle of sipping a glass of water choked & sprayed the water all over Elric and Donnie. It was then that Elric decided that maybe he would go lay down on his own bed.

"W-What?! 200,000 actual dollars? Like, as in, for real dollars?!"

Mizu got up to get Donnie a towel to wipe the water off of himself.

"Why the hell were you keeping this a secret?! It's kind of shitty on your part, Donatello. I've never had much but I've always shared it with you, no questions asked. I'm not keeping some secret offshore account!"

Mizu was fuming, but what she said was true. Ever since her & Donnie became a couple and even before that, she was always willing to share everything with him & his brothers. And now he had the audacity to keep something like that a secret?

"First of all, my account isn't off shore. Second of all, if you would let me FINISH" Donnie replied, trying to get a word in edgewise as Mizu threw the dishtowel at his face all the while swearing up a storm, and inventing new swears in the process "I was going to wait until Christmas & I had a little more saved up to ask you if you would move in with me"

"And you need $200,000 to ask me that?" she said exasperated

"No. I need $200,000 to buy the condo I planned on moving us into."

Her jaw hit the floor. For the first time in her life, Mizu was flabbergasted. Donnie, now dry, walked over to Mizu & took her hands in his.

"We've been seeing each other for 3 years now, & I don't see that changing. We can't get married in the traditional sense. Not legally anyway, so I thought this would be a good way to show you how much I love you and it's a way for us to be together more, unless you want to just live in this cramped apartment or in the lair with my brothers" He cocked an eyebrow and smiled a little at the thought.

Mizu just stood there like a deer in the headlights, Her jaw still flapping in the breeze.

"I… I…"

"Is that a yes?"

She squeezed her eyes shut, took a deep breath, and looked Donatello in the eyes.

"Donnie, I have something I need to tell you & you're going to have to sit down to hear it."

"Oh God, you're breaking up with me….. Are you breaking up with me?! Please tell me you aren't breaking up with me."

"What?! Oh, god no Donnie, it's not that. Why would you even think"

"Ohhhthankyoubabyjesus" Donatello exclaimed as he let out the breath he had apparently been holding in & cutting Mizu off for the second time that evening. "You really aren't breaking up with me?"

"No, I'm not" _but you might want to after I tell you what I need to tell you _she sullenly thought to herself.

"Good. Then what ever you have to tell me can wait until tomorrow morning."

"But!"

"I'm serious Mizu. I want you to think about what I asked you. We can sleep on it and talk about that & whatever it is that you need to tell me tomorrow morning. I'll make us breakfast. Besides, it's almost midnight & we're both tired. It would be better to talk about serious things in the morning." Donatello thought for a few seconds.

"You really aren't going to dump me?"

Mizu let out a tired laugh "No, I'm really not."

For the second time that evening. She couldn't tell if she was thankful for or disappointed in the stay of execution.


	4. Chapter 4

Donnie woke up early that morning for the same reason most of us wake up early in the morning. He had to pee. He glanced at the alarm clock on Mizu's night stand. 5:07am. Ugh. He put his head back on the pillow and tried to will away the urge to use the bathroom, but it was a loosing battle. He finally gave in, got up as quietly and a gently as he could so as not to wake the sleeping 30 year old girl, successfully stepped over a sleeping Elric & made his way to the bathroom.

He sighed with relief as the pressure on his bladder disappeared and seeing as how if he looked up he would get a sleepy eyeful of bright light bulbs, he let his eyes wander to the waste basket next to the toilet. What he saw almost made him turn mid-pee. He finished up, washed his hands (which he thought was silly considering he was about to go delving into the bathroom trash) and with shaky hands pulled the two pregnancy tests from the garbage. He stood up straight, inhaled deeply, held it for a second, and as he exhaled he looked at the tests. In a matter of seconds the room spun & went black.

* * *

Elric was the first to hear the commotion. He jumped up faster than one could thing a dog that big could move and immediately commenced his signature barkfest, which coupled with the crash from the bathroom, was enough to rip Mizu from slumber. Her body reacted before her brain could and she ran to the bathroom.

It took a minute for her sleep addled mind to put together the scene in the bathroom. Donnie apparently had fainted, grabbed on to the shower curtain for support, and when that failed horribly, he spun around while dangling from the now downed curtain & he landed on his back, where his carapace had knocked a nice chunk out of her apartment's one redeeming quality. The antique clawfoot porcelain tub.

"OH NO! DONNIE!"

She ran over to the downed turtle who was still kind of out of it. She brushed the drywall dust from the curtain rod hardware, off of his face and managed to untangle him from the shower curtain. She went to gather his head in her lap & reached for one of his hands. That's when she saw them. He was still clutching the two tests. He must have seen them in the trash! Her heart jumped into her throat & her face drained of it's color.

"not like this, I didn't want him to find out like this…"

"Unnnngh. Uh. Oww-ow-ow-owwww. Oh, man…. Mizu? What happened? Did I faint? I fainted didn't I? I'm a grown ass man & I fainted…"

"Shhhhhh… yeah it looks like you passed out, unless you and the tub are having a secret feud I don't know about. If you are it looks like you won" she smiled down at him, just glad he was ok.

"Oh, no… Your bathtub! I'm so sorry" He was about to go on apologizing as he raised his hand to rub his eyes his head. He stopped dead in his tracks, suddenly remembering what had caused him to faint in the first place.

His eyes darted from the tests to Mizu and after a few seconds of awkward silence they both blurted it out at the same time.

"I'm Pregnant"/"You're Pregnant"

Donnie went pale, well, pale green. His eyes became as big as saucers and he started to hyperventilate as he sat Indian style, still gripping the pregnancy tests.

"But You!…."

"Donnie"

"But I!…."

"_Donnie_."

"But We!…."

"DONATELLO!" Mizu looked at him with both eyebrows raised, and he seemed to snap out of it, mostly.

"Donnie, we need to talk about this. But first, you need to put down those tests. They've got pee on them. You take a second to wash your hands & collect yourself. I'm going to put on a pot of coffee."

Donnie, still a bit wide eyed, nodded in agreement and began to gather himself.

"French roast, please. And can you make it strong?" he squeaked out.

"Yes, Dear." She kissed him on his head and walked into the kitchen muttering "it's too damn early in the morning for this…" as she left him to his own devices.

* * *

Donatello stared down in disbelief at his coffee mug, but for all the intense looks he was giving it, he failed to notice the single black dog hair floating on the surface of the creamy tan liquid. These days he took a splash of cream in his coffee. It helped to cut down on the acid reflux.

"I still can't believe it. You're sure you're pregnant?"

"I'm pretty sure Donnie. Those tests don't often give false positives. Plus I'm late. That's why I took them in the first place. You know my ovaries run smoother than a sweatshop. You can practically set your watch to them."

"But how? How could this even happen?" he muttered

"Well, you see, when two people love each other very much…"

"You're really going to crack that joke right now?" he said before he took a sip of his coffee. He paused and picked the dog hair out of his mug, and finally took a sip of the caffeinated beverage. Thank the maker for coffee. "I still don't see how this is even possible. We're not the same species. Our DNA shouldn't even be compatible."

"Yeah, but you're not exactly not human either Donnie. You & your brothers we're given a healthy dose of mutagen goodness. It's reasonable to believe that your, uh, genetic material shall we say, has some adaptative trick up their tiny sleeves."

"Good point. I never thought of that. But if that's the case, why has it taken 3 years? We haven't exactly been birth control champions or anything." His mind raced with various scientific reasons & precedents. He was even doing a couple of punnett squares in his head to try and figure out what genetic qualities a terrapin human hybrid might have.

" Earth to Donnie! That problem could be on my end Donnie. There are many reasons it could have taken so long. And as much as I'd love to hypothesize about my fertility with you, we have to discuss what to do about this."

Donnie's head jerked up and his expression fell. "What do you mean 'what to do about this'?"

"Oh man, ok. Here goes…. Donnie, you know how I feel about children…"

"I know" He went pale green again, as he nodded.

"And you know I never planned on having any…"

"I, I know" he felt a sob catch in his throat. He knew where this was going, but he had to hear her out.

"Donnie. I'm not keeping it. I don't want to be a mother."

There it was. Mizu had just put all of her cards on the table. Donatello wished he didn't know this was coming the second he found those tests in the garbage, but some small part of him knew she didn't want this. Mizu had always been a vocal proponent of being childfree. She even went so far as getting a VHEMT tattoo. He wasn't even sure he wanted children, but now, the opportunity had presented itself, and he'd be lying if he said he hadn't at least entertained the thought once or twice. It was something he thought should at least be considered seriously.

"Donatello, at least say something? Please? Donnie?"

Mizu's eyes filled with tears and thought it couldn't possibly have gone any worse. Donatello finally looked at her through tears of his own, searching her face for answers to questions he didn't have. After what felt like forever he stood up from the table, walked over to the window and left without a word.

Elric, who had done his best to steer clear from the tension up until this point, padded over and put his head in her lap. He looked up at her with his big brown eyes as if to tell her it would be ok. Mizu hugged her dog and cried.


	5. Chapter 5

Donatello laid on the cot in his lab staring at the brick wall counting the divots. Anything to keep his mind off of the shit show that was last Sunday morning.

_562… 563… 564…_

"Oh Donnie Boooooy, Da Pipes, Da Pipes Are Calllllin'" Donnie picked his head off the pillow to look over his shoulder/shell. Raph was walking over to the cot and tracking water in with him and laughing at his oh-so-clever song writing.

"Come on brainpan, get up. There's a leaky pipe in da bathroom and it ain't fixin' its self. And stop dat. You look like a damn hootie owl, head spun aroun damn near 180 dagrees. What?! What?!"

Donnie just looked at him with dead tired eyes. His face was drawn and when he sat up he slouched & sighed. "I'll get my wrench"

"Betta bring ya soldering iron too, pal. I kinda tried ta fix it myself." He gave Donatello his most charming grin while scratching the back of his head.

Donnie shot him another deadpan look and sighed again. He grabbed his tool box, pushed past Raph and headed into the bathroom. The floor was covered in water from a pipe leaking beneath a sink. It was probably a just a drip before Raph got to it, but now it was a steady gush. Donnie plunked his toolbox into the sink & shut off the valve that supplied water to the bathroom just as Raphael walked through the door.

"Oh yeah. I shoulda thought of dat."

Donatello just gave him the same somewhat annoyed blank stare as he grabbed his wrench and got on his back & began removing the busted pipe.

"What da hell has your problem been, dweeb? You've been sulkin' around here since last weekend actin' like somebody killed ya kitten."

Donnie looked sideways at raph, who had no idea how close to right he was.

"Did Mizu dump ya' ass or something?"

"No."

"Den what's the dilly-yo? Oh my god. Did I just say dat? I've been spendin' too much time with Mikey."

"Yes, you have been, and it's none of your business. So drop it."

"Speakin' of dat broad, it's Saturday. Shouldn't you be at her place by now? Somethin's up…"

"I said drop it."

"No. You are gonna tell me what the fuck ya problem is," he wiggled his wet toes above Donatello's face "Or I'm gonna shove my toe up ya nose."

Donatello suddenly wondered if Raph broke the pipe on purpose as he struggled against his older brother's childish attack. Thirty one was entirely too old to be forcibly shoving your foot onto your brother's face.

"Unnngh STOP IT!"

"NO!"

"I SAID CUT IT OUT!"

"NOT UNTIL ugh YOU SPILL DA BEANS!"

After another minute of yelling & struggling Raph managed to shove one of his two toes into his brother's eye. Bathroom floor-water trickled down the side of his face. Donnie couldn't take it anymore.

"SHE'S PREGNANT ALRIGHT!" The words echoed off the tile walls and dissipated into an uncomfortable silence. Raph was stunned into non-movement, his foot still on his brother's face.

"UGH! Get OFF me already" Donatello shoved up from under Raph's foot, and successfully knocked him back on his ass. They both sat on the wet tile for another moment as Donatello caught his breath. He stood up and left the room to get another length of pipe from his workshop. Raph was quick on his heels, and as soon as he entered the workshop he quickly closed and locked the door behind him.

"You friggin' knocked her up?! What da hell Donnie?!"

"It's not exactly like I planned it."

"No shit Sherlock. Whaddya gonna do?"

"Nothing. I'm not doing anything. She isn't keeping it." He said in an eerily even tone.

"Excuse me? Did I just hear ya right? Because I don't think I heard ya right."

"You heard me. She isn't keeping the baby."

"Oh man. You ok with dat?"

"I don't know. I…. ugh, I can barely wrap my mind around the whole situation. Ohmygod. Raph. You _can't_ tell Leo or Mikey! Mikey loves kids, he'd be devastated. And Leo has been all 'life is a gift & is precious' since Dad passed. I'm not sure how he'd react. Besides, it's none of their business. I can't believe I even told you."

"No, no man. I got ya back. I won't tell em. Look, I'm no good at dis emotional crap but if you need me I'm here for ya. No turtle is a mountain."

"You mean island. 'No man is an island' And Raph?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."


	6. Chapter 6

*Ring….. Ring….. Hi you've reached Donnie. Leave a message*

"Hey, It's me. Look I know you're still mad or upset or whatever, but it's been a week and a half. My appointment is next week, and I'll need your help. Call me back."

Mizu hung up the phone and slumped back on to the couch. A mountain of work sat in front of her. She had left her old accounting firm to strike out on her own as a bookkeeper and business was decent. She made enough to pay the rent, take care of Elric, and have a little extra for fun things but she was by no means rolling in the dough. It was boring & tedious work, but she had a head for finance. And her somewhat alternative look helped her land some interesting clients. She was now doing the books for a few art galleries, boutiques, and tattoo parlors (one of which she bartered with occasionally). It was Bank Rec week so she had plenty to do, but her mind just wouldn't settle. Who could think of debits & credits at a time like this?

Donatello hadn't spoken to her in days. It was the longest they had gone without some form of communication & she was starting to worry. He always checked in even when they were having spats because although his & his brother's lives had simmered down considerably over the years, they still patrolled from time to time. For all she knew he was lying face down in a gutter or face down in some hussy. Thinking about the latter just added fuel to the fire.

Finally her phone rang & while she usually hated when Donnie secretly changed the ringtone for his number, she was secretly glad to her the chorus to She Bangs. _fucking ricky martin…_ she thought as a smile tugged at the corner of her mouth & she sighed relieved. She cleared her head and answered the phone.

"WHERE THE _HELL_ HAVE YOU BEEN?! I'VE BEEN WORRIED SICK, YOU ASSHAT!"

"Hi. You needed something?"

"Yeah, I needed to know you were, you know, still alive & shit… I thought we agreed that we would at least text or something no matter what was going on between us. You scared me Donnie." The worry in her voice was palpable.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that. Look we need to talk."

"I know"

"Can I come over later tonight?"

"Yeah, ok." She felt her chin quiver. Something about the tone in Donatello's voice didn't bode well.

"I'll see you at 9. Bye."

"Bye."

* * *

9pm came & went and Mizu started to pace her apartment… well, as much as her apartment would allow. It was about 9:17 when there finally came a knock at her living area window. Elric could be heard barking from the bedroom. She had put him in there so her & Donatello could talk uninterrupted. She went over to the window to let him in.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"Are you feeling ok?"

"What? Oh. Yeah. A little nauseous, but that's to be expected. It's a good sign. It means I'm only about a month or so along. It's still early. I can go to a regular doctor and they won't be able to tell there's something different about this pregnancy."

"Oh. I take it you're going to go through with your appointment?"

"Yeah. I am. Donnie, I have my reasons for this you know."

"What? What could your reasons possibly be for aborting our child?" Donatello's voice was raised. Mizu responded in kind.

"Let's pretend my main reason doesn't exist for a second and consider the fact that this pregnancy might not be safe for me Donnie. I could miscarry, hemorrhage, clot, who else knows. And I can't exactly see a doctor for care you know. As smart as you are you're not exactly an ob/gyn. And let's say I make it to term. Would my body be able to handle passing a child if it had a shell?"

"That's highly unlikely" he tried unsuccessfully to cut in.

"Could you deliver the child if it breeches? How about an umbilical cord around the neck? I doubt it. And the child?! There are a million things that could be wrong Donatello. It could be deformed. It could be mentally handicapped. It could be still born. Could you handle delivering a dead child? COULD YOU?"

"I…. I…. You don't even know if any of that would even happen."

"Jesus Christ, Donnie."

"But you don't! You're just so hell bent on not being a mother you're thinking up the worst possible outcomes. "

"That's right Donatello. I DON'T want to be a mother. I'm just not the type of woman who has ever wanted kids. We covered that the second we got serious. And you were ok with it. Remember? Did you think I was fucking kidding?!"

"Things change Mizu. Maybe I've changed."

"Well I haven't Donnie. I like my life. I like my life with you & Elric. I like the freedom. I like being able to focus on us & only us. I don't need a child to be happy. I don't want a child in my life. Ever."

"Look. I can't tell you what to do here. But please… Mizu… at least think about this. I'm asking, no BEGGING…. Please just think about this…" There were tears in his eyes at this point.

"I'm sorry. I'm not changing my mind." Mizu's eyes were filled with guilt for hurting him so much but not for her decision.

Donatello was at the end of his rope. He stood up and looked at Mizu.

"If you're going to go through with the ab.." he could barely even say it "..abortion, you'll have to do it without me. I'm sorry, but this" he motioned between them both "I think it's over."

And with that, both he and the three years they had spent together went out the window.


	7. Chapter 7

The morning of Mizu's appointment was uneventful. She was a bit cranky since her appointment wasn't until 1pm and she wasn't allowed any food since the following night, as a precautionary measure for general anesthesia. Her stomach rumbled as she got Elric's breakfast ready. Never before had dog food looked so tempting… Elric took his sweet time at the food bowl, picking around the green beans to get to the good stuff. Raw duck patties. He chewed slowly. She could tell he was doing it on purpose, mocking her.

"JUST EAT YOUR DAMN BREAKFAST ALREADY" Elric acted like her little outburst didn't happen & went back to eating. Besides, anyone who knew her knew that to deny her breakfast was to incur her wrath.

She hadn't heard from Donatello since their fight the previous Wednesday and she wasn't sure if she was sad or ok with that fact. The last thing she needed was him begging or yelling. Secretly she was relieved that he hadn't showed up & she wasn't expecting him, which is why she was startled by the knock on the window. Elric was trying to bark in between mouthfuls of food. A true multi-tasker if there ever was one.

"Leo? What are you doing here."

"Donnie finally told us what happened between you two. Well… Not so much he did as Raph told us. I came to accompany you to your appointment."

She was floored. And confused.

"Really? You?"

"Yes?" he answered back as a question.

"You want to go with me"

"Yes."

"To my abortion?" she sounded incredulous.

*Sigh*"Yes. I do."

She squinted an eye and raised the eyebrow above the other, a finger pointing in the air and her mouth open as if about to say something, but she couldn't think of what. Leo mused to himself that she looked like that rum toting pirate in the liquor store windows. Finally she dropped her hand in a huff.

"…. I got nothing. I'm going to need you to explain Leo, because I just don't get it."

"I think you're doing the right thing."

"I quit. That's it! I give up! I'm in the fucking twilight zone! Scientist rational turtle is pro-life, religion Buddhist turtle is pro-choice…." She was quite exasperated at this point and waving her arms around wildly "WILL SOMEBODY TELL ME WHAT CHRISTMAS IS ALL ABOUT?!"

Leo gave her a gentle smile and giggled at her Charlie Brown reference. The old movie was one of the few things that he and Mizu shared an affinity for and they quoted it frequently.

"Look, I know this is weird coming from me, but I agree with your choice. Your safety is important, and a life in the shadows is no life for a child that may or may not be healthy. And you have the courage to admit that motherhood isn't for you. Knowing this is a strength Mizu, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. My brothers and I know what it is like to grow up unwanted & unwelcome. Mistakes. Nobody deserves that kind of life. And the evil we've seen…. The direction the planet is headed… this world is no place for children."

Mizu's eyes brimmed with tears of relief as she heard Leonardo validating her decision. And coming from him of all people… She threw herself at him for a hug and put her arms around his shoulders and sniffled into his neck. This caught Leo a bit off guard. He wasn't use to affection from women, even after his relationship with iceberg formerly known as Karai. He just stood there for a moment and finally hugged her back and let her cry. She was so soft…

"Look, I'm grateful for the support Leo, but what about the 'high on life' kick you've been on. Telling us that life is precious and all that… it's just… this is very unexpected."

He took her by the shoulders and pushed her away from his chest, smiling down at her again.

"I know. Just because I think life should be lived to the fullest doesn't mean I think we should make more of them. Now, what time is your appointment?"

"One" she sniffled back.

"Well, if we take your car I can wait in a parking garage and pick you up in front of the medical office and drive you home. You can send me a text once you're out of recovery and I'll stay until evening to make sure you're ok. How were you planning on getting home by yourself anyway?"

"I was hoping Donatello would help me, but I would have just taken the subway."

"After anesthesia?! Are you insane?!"

"He's really not coming is he?"

"I don't think so kiddo. Tell you what, it's only 11. Why don't we watch Charlie Brown? With this heat I could use a little Christmas in July and you could use some cheering up. You know neither of us can resist trying to get Elric to do the Snoopy dance"

"That's a brilliant idea!" Mizu jumped up and ran to the DVD shelf in her bedroom like a kid running after an ice cream truck. Leo chuckled but his smile quickly fell once she was out of sight. He couldn't help but think what a big mistake his brother was making. When he got home he would tell him so.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N Well, this is the second to last chapter I think. I hope you're enjoying the ride :)

I'm having trouble deciding if I want them to have a happy ending or not... I'm thinking of doing it "choose your own way" style. Two endings each as their own chapter, one happy, one less so. we'll see.

* * *

While Mizu's morning had been nothing out of the ordinary, it had been a turbulent one at the lair. Mikey was tired of the tension that had been hanging in the air the past week and he was worried about Donatello. He was depressed and quick to anger and effectively making life miserable for everyone. He had decided a family meeting was in order to discuss what was wrong with Donatello. Things had gotten pretty heated, and Donatello had had enough of his brothers prying into his private life.

"Fuck you people. It's none of your fucking business! I don't need this!"

Donatello was almost out of the living room when he heard Michelangelo quip "I'd have dumped that moody bastard too if I was her, jeez" In a flash Donatello threw a lamp at Mike's head and then was on him like white on rice.

"GRAB HIM!" Leo & Raph managed to get him off of mikey and pinned him to a wall. Leo, ever the leader slipped into the roll as if he'd never left it.

"Raph, I know you know what's going on. Tell us. Now." There was a certain authority to his tone that couldn't be ignored.

"It's not really up ta me to tell ya"

"NOW" leo barked.

Donatello gritted his teeth. "Keep your fucking mouth shut Raph!" All that earned him was an icy stare from his brother.

"Mizu's Pregnant. She's not keeping it."

"WHAT?!"/"FUCK YOU!" Donatello broke free of his brothers & made his way out of the living room.

"Dude…." Mikey half whispered, holding a hand over his eye. "I didn't see that coming"

"How long have you known?"

"A little over a week. Her appointment is today"

And with that Leo made for the surface, hoping to catch her in time.

* * *

Everything went smoothly at the clinic. Leo drove her home and helped her settle into bed. She was glad he was there because the anesthesia had indeed left her pretty out of it for the rest of the night. And while she was appreciative, Leo couldn't help but resent the fact that he was there and Donatello wasn't.

He got home at about 11pm that night. He was in a mood and a black cloud followed him down the hall to his brother's room, as he planned out in his head exactly what he would say to his brother. He found he had to force the door because Donatello slumped down on the floor in the corner behind it, a nearly empty bottle of Van Gogh Blue between his legs.

He sighed and the fight went out of him as he thought. _And he's supposed to be the smart one._

He squeezed through the door and laid Donatello on his stomach on the floor so he wouldn't aspirate in the night.

"Leoh? Ss'that you?"

"Yeah, it's me"

"isshe ohkay?"

"Yeah, she's ok."

"Damn." Donatello blacked out.

* * *

3:00am Mizu woke up crying. The reality of the situation had sunk in. Donnie was gone. He was never coming back. In that moment she hated him. She hated that he had lied about his wishes for the future. She hated that he had left her to clean up his mess. She hated that he didn't bother to even see if he was ok. She hated that she was alone. She hated that she had even bothered to love him so fucking much.

It was hard at first to even get out of bed. Thoughts of Donnie always dredged up a confusing mix of love/hate, but she managed to squash them down to the point of being able to function. But late at night, when Elric was asleep and she was alone with her thoughts she almost always found herself wanting to run to him. _That Motherfucker_. She wanted nothing more than to punch him square in the face and then kiss him. They had been through so much, and he threw it away… But days became weeks became months, and eventually things got easier for Mizu. She never regretted her decision and if she had it to do over, she would.

* * *

Donatello had shut down emotionally. He didn't patrol or really even leave the lair anymore, save for the few nights he caught himself on the rooftop across from Mizu's building stealing glimpses of her and Elric. She looked happy, well, not miserable anyway. How the fuck dare she have made it out of this ok? How could that bitch just go on with her life like nothing happened. Otherwise, He just locked himself up in his workshop and kept his mind busy with work. His small software business continued to take off and Microsoft had made him an offer. For all intents and purposes he was a very wealthy turtle, but he had nobody to share it with & he was pretty sure he didn't care. Food tasted like ash, things he used to like held little joy, and he had developed a nightly drinking habit to kill the pain. Self-Medicating he called it. He was the house physician after all. He thought he was holding up pretty well, considering the woman he had practically proposed to cut him out of one of the biggest decisions of his life. She was the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with and he couldn't stand the sight of her. When the alcoholic fog would lift the anger would come rushing back. He was angry that they had been so lax about birth control. He was angry that she didn't ask him what he had wanted. He was angry that she wasn't sorry for what she did. He was angry that even after all of it he still loved her so much he could choke.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N Well, I struggled with this but I think I came up with the perfect ending. I have an alternate one in the works, but this just seems so perfect.

* * *

This February night was bitter cold, but Donatello didn't care. He had been walking the streets for hours, letting his feet take him where they may. Despite his cold blood he had always liked the winter. He had become quite adept at bundling up just right and blending in with the other people who would shuffle along in the cold to their destinations. Also, the cold had the added effect of slowing his brain down enough for him to get a grip on reality, so the seasonal drop in temperature and the intervention his brothers had planned were somewhat successful in keeping him sober for the past month and a half. One day at a time as they say. Tonight was rough though. His phone had sent him an alert that Elric's 6th birthday was tomorrow. He had forgotten to delete that reminder, and the pang of hurt was immediate. He loved that dog, and he missed him. He missed them both so much, but his pride wouldn't let him go to her. Besides as far as he was concerned, their relationship was beyond repair. He had gone on a walk to clear his head and before he knew it he was downtown, standing in front of a dive bar he and Mizu could actually frequent. The low lighting and miserable townies had afforded them some privacy, and as long as they got there before 11pm the hipster crowd had yet to flood the joint with their prying eyes. Donnie shrugged and walked through the door. Maybe he would have a beer. Just one wouldn't hurt. Or maybe he would just have a soda. He hadn't quite decided how miserable he was yet. What he saw floored him.

"Hey everyone, it's been a while since my last open-mic so if you're going to heckle me at least buy me a beer" this drew some laughs from the crowd and she adjusted the acoustic guitar on her lap. "Ok, this is my rendition of _On Love, On Life_ by Bayside. Here goes"

She strummed the intro and began to sing

**_"So I sit here writing words in our old place  
They all come out as letters  
And I contemplate mistakes that we all make  
Start and the ending of eras  
When history fades  
We identify the problems  
But, they may not be problems after all…"_**

Her voice filled the bar and some patrons looked up from their pint glasses and pizzas while others went about their conversations. Donnie was glued to the spot in the doorway. It couldn't possibly be her...

**_"Shock and dismay, they affect what we say  
We should bite our tongues, we should bite our tongues  
'Cause after all, it's only our lives anyway..."_**

The singer thought to herself that that grey peacoat and purple scarf looked familiar, but it was hard to concentrate on both the crowd and playing.

**_"And I can't let it bother me  
If fact and fate just can't agree on love, on life  
Can't we stop taking ourselves too seriously?"_**

Donatello closed his eyes and just listened to the rhythmic chords. He smiled as she fell short of a few of the higher notes. He was on the verge of breaking down and rushing the makeshift stage when a waitress told him to move it or lose it.

**_"So I sit here carving words into the wall  
Words that remind me of just how I was  
I never felt as old and lonely as I felt  
When I was young and in love  
When history fades  
We identify the problems  
But, they may not be problems after all…"_**

He went up to the bar and ordered a Rob Roy and a 20oz IPA. The bartender handed him his drinks and Donatello took a seat at an empty high top. After pondering the two he sipped the rob roy and stared at the two cherries floating in the carbonated soda. He closed his eyes again and smiled as the singer continued. He took a pen out of his pocket and scribbled a note on the napkin the beer was sitting on.

**_"Shock and dismay, they affect what we say  
We should bite our tongues, we should bite our tongues  
'Cause after all, it's only our lives anyway..."_**

She caught a glimpse of his eyes under the brim of the cadet style knit winter hat he was wearing and recognized the distinct shade of rust-brown. But her mind was focused on the song and she couldn't be sure without stopping and drawing everyone's attention, so she continued and thought I'll catch him after

**_"And I can't let it bother me  
If fact and fate just can't agree on love, on life  
Can't we stop taking ourselves too seriously?  
Can't let it bother me  
If fact and fate just can't agree on love, on life  
Can't we stop taking ourselves too seriously?"_**

She strummed the last few chords and said a rushed thanks to the crowd before she practically threw the guitar down and jumped over the amplifier & floor speakers. She pushed her way through the throng of people. When the hell did the place get so fucking busy? By the time she got to the high top he was gone. There was a full beer on the table sitting on a napkin, and propped up on the glass were a couple of cherry stems that had been idly twisted into a ring shape. She moved the beer aside and picked the cherry stems up along with the napkin and sprawled across it were two simple words in a handwriting that she had missed so badly it hurt her soul. The note simply said:

"Marry Me?"

The End.


End file.
